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Who Loves You?

“I am the one I have been looking for.”

 –Iyanla Vanzant

We spend so much of our time waiting to be loved, hoping love will find us, searching, yearning for that special love. Feeling empty and lost without it. Wanting someone to give us love and fill us up. Unfortunately, that’s not usually how life works.

You will draw to you exactly what you create in your life. You will draw to you what you believe you are worthy of. Nothing more, nothing less. In other words, when you believe that you are worthy of love, you will love yourself and then you will draw love to you from other sources.

Let’s take this a step at a time. Take a realistic evaluation of yourself. Be honest with yourself about how valuable you believe you are as a person. The way you see yourself and treat yourself is the very way others will see you and treat you. Do you see yourself as valuable, worthy of the gift of love? More importantly, do you treat yourself lovingly and as a valuable being? It’s ok to be truthful with yourself, it may not be pretty! Awareness is the first and more powerful step on the path to change!

If you find that you have believed yourself as unworthy of love-then right here and now, I want you to forgive yourself. After all, there were probably things in your childhood or previous years that created that belief for you. It simply isn’t true; every being on this planet is worthy of love, after all, love is what we are here for, it’s what it’s all about. Say to yourself now; “I forgive myself for believing that I was not worthy of love.” Go look in a mirror and say it out loud to yourself, look yourself right in the eyes and say it like you mean it. Go on, I’ll wait.

That was probably difficult for some of you, but I knew you could do it! Now, I want you to post this affirmation up someplace where you will see it each and every day; “I have the courage to believe that I am worthy of love.” Read it out loud, every day, at least once, ideally at least ten times each time you notice it. Sticky notes are fabulous for affirmations.

Then, take action and make those words real. Begin loving and valuing yourself. It is said that you cannot give away what you do not have. So, if you are not able to love and accept yourself unconditionally, how in the world are you going to love and accept anyone else unconditionally? Much less accept that love in return from them?

Remember, love is not a feeling, it is a choice! Make the choice to love yourself. After all, who deserves it more? The more loving you are to yourself, the more loving you will be able to be to everyone around you. Family and friends will especially benefit from this. Make a choice to come from a place of love for yourself and for everyone who is important in your life.

Think about what you need to fill that emptiness inside, that place that is longing for love. What specifically do you need? Find the answer and then give it to yourself. Yes, I said you will give it to yourself. No one is more capable of loving you, and giving you exactly what you need than you are! When you learn how to fulfill yourself in that way, you stop searching for it outside of yourself and you suddenly begin attracting it to you! You change yourself from a sponge to a magnet! People see you radiating self love and they are drawn to you!

Moreover, it is natural to love ourselves. We are born loving ourselves, babies are fascinated with themselves!  They haven’t yet learned the art of beating themselves up because their cheeks are too chubby or because they went through too many pairs of diapers today. They accept themselves. So remind yourself that loving yourself is a natural, normal state of being. To not have that self love is unnatural by all laws, yet it is so common in our society that we accept it as the norm.

Remember that nature loves, nature never doubts. Find the nature within, the love of self that is your true birthright. When you love yourself unconditionally, you allow yourself to fly. Learn to spread your wings. Like a bird, find the self love within and soar!

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