Valerie's Writing & Photography

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Awareness and Change

Why do people think personal development is difficult?

This is because, so often, when we begin to make changes in our lives, we expect to see the results, immediately. Especially in the US, this culture of instant gratification. Instant messages, microwaves, cell phones, camera phones …everything can be done immediately, or almost immediately. There’s not much waiting, and God Forbid we should have to wait at some point.
In my experience, things that come about gradually, are always much more worth the wait, than the things we get instantly. Granted, it can be *very* difficult to wait, hard to trust, and have patience, to know that you are indeed on the path, when it feels like nothing is moving.
Dieting is like this.   Losing weight fast, almost always guarantees that you will gain it back, while losing the weight more slowly, tends to mean the weight will stay off.  Working through the extra slow spots and the plateau’s allows us to find our inner strength, it shines a light on our spiritual strength, because sometimes there is nothing we can do or change on the outside in those moments, to change what we don’t like. There is no other choice but to turn within and trust, and continue what you have been doing.
What brought this to my attention is the realization, in the past few days, of where my focus is lying.   For a LONG time now, since my early 20′s, almost half my life, I have been on a spiritual path.   Sometimes that path has had more focus than other times, but it has always been a part of my life.   At times I would feel frustrated with myself, wondering why I let the ego get in the way so often, when in my mind I knew better.   Knowing the truth and the principles is very different than actually living and breathing them, day in and day out.   When you dissect the entire human experience, the whole point of everything we learn here comes down to that, overcoming the ego and becoming the spirit while in human earthly form, so obviously, it’s not something that comes easy.    Lately, with the blessing of Kirtan coming into my life, thanks to one of my best friends who introduced it to me, my love of music and singing, along with spirituality have been combined.   Getting back to my original point, I have noticed lately that my spiritual path is coming more and more into the forefront in my life, while the ego fades (and subsequently fights back with a vengeance at times, which it will always do, in order to hold onto its power, and not be snuffed out) more and into the background of my focus.  This comes only after trying for that for half my life.   Lately, it is coming without effort.  And, without me even realizing that changes have occurred, or indeed that I had been working very hard towards them at this time.
So, perseverance has paid off, and the reward has begun to show up, at a point when I wasn’t even looking for it, but simply living it and doing it.   So perhaps, even as much as patience, trust and perseverance, letting go of the final result is just as important!
As a life coach, I too am always learning and growing in life.  This has been a beautiful lesson and blessing all in one, which has been a long time coming.

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